Monday, December 9, 2013

Baby Emmett

Birth Story beware:

Back at 32 wks, my midwife noticed that I had been measuring large for the last couple of appts.  Just a couple weeks larger than I actually was.  So I was scheduled an ultrasound to see if baby boy was just going to be big or if there was extra fluid.  I was 34 wks when the ultrasound was taken.  Laurie, the midwife was busy looking at the results of the ultrasound while the resident with her was measuring me.  The resident didn't know why I had gotten the ultrasound, and proceeded to measure me three times before finally asking why I was so large.  I measured at 39 wks that week.  Baby boy wasn't overly large and the fluid levels were fine, so why was I measuring large?  He was breech.  Apparently, if they don't flip, they take up more room.  I wasn't too concern, there was still plenty of time for him to flip.  Laurie tells me there are some positions that I can try to encourage him to move so I tried a few of them, but I never felt that major motion.

 As it got closer and closer to the date, and I was still measuring large, we started talking about possible scenarios for if he remained in a breech position.  The first and foremost obvious solution is a C-section.  I wanted to avoid this at all cost and Laurie was well aware of this.  She had delivered all three of my children up until this point and we both wanted to continue to have her deliver this one. She would not have been able to do the C-section.  She mentioned a procedure called ECV.  They would take an ultrasound at 38 weeks and depending on his positioning, (things like if his foot was in the birth canal, or the cord was around his neck, mean C-section) they would at 39 weeks, give me an epidural and try to manually turn him from the outside with the guidance of an ultrasound.  If they were successful, I would immediately get induced.  If it wasn't successful, which they were only about 56% successful, C-section.  With all of this, my hopes of going into labor naturally went out the window.  Oh well, I could live with that.  I know that some people would try to do a vaginal delivery of a breech baby, that is a risk I wasn't willing to take.

At my 37 wk appt., Laurie got called into delivery 10 minutes before I arrived, so I met with Dr. Cypher.  I am not a big fan of him.  He is extremely good at his job, but his bed side manner is rather cold.  We talked about when, if a C-section was going to be schedule, it would happen.  My ultrasound to determine everything was scheduled the day before Thanksgiving and I would hit 39 wks the Sat. afterwards.  Ideally, they perform C-sections as soon as you hit 39 weeks, however it is a holiday weekend and a Saturday, so he said, maybe Friday or most likely, the following Monday.  Ok,  I have all the realistic scenarios going through my head and I am trying to plan around them.  I had a prenatal massage schedule for the Monday before Thanksgiving, but that fell through, Dr. had an emergency and they had my old cell phone number and couldn't get a hold of me to let me know.  I was very disappointed, but we were going to see if we could get me in the next two days.

Tuesday morning, 5:45, Ethan was "getting ready" for work, which usually consist of trying to sneak back into bed for a couple of minutes before leaving the house at the very last minute.  I was awaken by him and trying to get him to head to work.  I went to the bathroom while he was getting dressed and when I climbed back into bed, my hips creaked and groaned the way they had for the last 4 weeks, and as I laid down, my water broke.  Let me remind you, my water broke with Mark and Lyssa (Ryan was induced).  They were small trickles.  This wasn't.  I pretty much flooded my bed.  I was horrified.  I wasn't due for almost another 2 weeks.  Ethan was ecstatic because he no longer had to go to work.  Timing wise, it worked out well, because had he left I wouldn't have been able to get a hold of him for at least an hour and it would have taken him an hour to get back.  Called the birthing suite and they were asking me all these questions, like how dilated or effaced was I, how was my last internal exam, all of these things I didn't have a clue about because I was supposed to find out the next day with the ultrasound.  One thing though, I was sure I was going to get the C-section.  Since my water broke, getting the ECV was out of the question since you need to fluid to help move the baby.  I wasn't prepared at all.  We didn't have the bassinet set up, I didn't have my hospital bag ready.  I had only just brought down his clothes from the attic the day before to get washed.  You get the picture.

The nurses when I called told me take my time and get a shower, eat something small and light, which I was a little surprised at with the C-section, I thought they wouldn't want me to eat at all beforehand.  Ethan called Mom and had her come over for the kids and we left for the hospital at 7:30.  I was not having any contractions.  This was the same reaction as with Mark and Lyssa.  Water breaks and contractions didn't start until a couple hours later. The nurses were hesitant to believe that my water had broken, so they did a test and because I had suspected a yeast infection the day before, the monistat messed with the test results.  They ended up using a brown paper bag and just having me sit on it.  I guess it is their old school method of doing it, the bag absorb water after an hour or something?  I told the nurses we were concerned about him being breech so Dr. Cypher, who was already there doing a C-section came and did the ultrasound.  He had flipped.  I couldn't have been happier.  I firmly believed that him flipping is what caused my water to break.  Not only had he flipped, but lucky for me, it was Laurie's day for delivery.  Everything I was wishing/hoping for was happening.

Laurie checked me about 9 am and I was only barely at 1 going on to 2 cm.  Not at all effaced.  I had literally started off at zero coming into the hospital. They got me on Pitocin and it was a long time before anything really happened.  They measured me again at 1pm and I was at 3cm.  I asked for the epidural then.  I knew how long it could take for them to come up and I didn't want to be in too much pain while they were trying to administer it.  Well the anesthesiologist apparently was already on the floor and came like two minutes later.  She was this little islander lady and she was fast.  I had a hard time understanding anything she was saying and she was done in like 5 minutes.  The epidural didn't help much.  It numbed my legs and the upper half of my abdomen numb, but left the lower part pretty much untouched.  At 2pm, they checked me again, 4 cm, and decided to administer extra fluid to the baby, since his heart beat kept decreasing at each contraction.  It was done with Ryan so I knew what to expect, doesn't make it feel any less weird.  It was a very slow moving day in my opinion, but come 4pm, I finally started making the move in dilating and hit 5-6, and at 5:30 they were at 9. Laurie stayed with me for the delivery, even though she could have left since the actual pushing didn't start until after she was done, but she stayed for me.  This is why I loved her. The actual pushing only took about 20 minutes and he was out at 6:05pm. 

Emmett Levi Fike weight in at 7lbs 2 oz, and was 20 inches long.  He has a very nicely shaped head, which Laurie said comes from his lack of being in the birth canal for long.  He also had a full head of hair, and had been a very mellow baby.  A little Jaundice, but nothing that has been a concern. As for his name, Ethan had asked if we could have another ELF in the family after I had suggested Emily Louise as a name if it had been a girl. So Emmett, was the only E boy name that we could agree upon that wasn't Ethan, I personally hate family names as first names.  Ethan's initials spell out Elf.  I could work within those parameters.  Levi was after his favorite companion on his mission.

H greatly reminds me of Mark in looks, but he already surpasses all of the older kids in sleeping and mellow-ness.  Took him a few days before he would take to nursing but he does well now

Sunday, August 11, 2013

Think before you speak, or MYOB

I am currently 23 weeks pregnant with another boy.  This particular pregnancy has me even more annoyed with comments and statements from other people.  Not that it is anyone's business, but yes, this was a planned pregnancy.  Yes, I am aware that Ryan and boy#3 will be rather close in age.  Yes, I know this is my fourth child.  Yes, I know how birth control works.  No, I wasn't upset to find out it was another boy. 

When we got married, I had always thought that I would have three kids.  I fully intended on Ryan being the last.  However, about 6 weeks after he was born, it became very apparent to Ethan and I that our family wasn't done.  Ok, fine, we are supposed to have another kid.  Ok, I can handle this.  Thinking it out, 18 months between pregnancy doesn't sound bad to me.  Mark and Lyssa are 20 months apart, and Ryan is 2yrs and 8 mths younger than Lyssa.  The first two are close, the second two will be close.  As for planning, we have not had any issues with getting pregnant.  We have been very blessed, if anything, we have to be very proactive in not getting pregnant.  That time line would have had me pregnant sometime Nov/Dec-ish.  Start of 2013, I start getting another impression that this baby needed to come within the year.  As in born within this year.  That scared me.  I wanted my body to have more time to heal between pregnancies.  I don't relish the idea of two children in diapers. I didn't want it to be that soon.  I talked to Ethan about it and decided, well we don't know what the next year holds for us, but we were going to try anyways. 

I find out in April that I am pregnant.  I wasn't even sure what his due date would be, I hadn't regulated since Ryan so I didn't have a consistent time frame to work with.  Since the previous pregnancies have gone very smoothly and morning sickness is not an issue for me, I didn't even bother with scheduling an appt. with an OB/GYN until the end of May.  She scheduled an ultrasound to determine due date for Dec. 7th. This baby will be born within 2013.  Ryan will be 18 mths.  Just barely old enough to go to Nursery.  I can't wait for Nursery.

Now that it is Aug. there are several possible reasons that have shown up as to why this possibly needed to happen now.  Ethan's parents have just moved to Tennessee.  After serious consideration and a myriad of reason that I am not going into, I have agreed to the idea of moving, pending a decent job.  Maybe the pregnancy needed to happen while we are still on this health insurance. While I still have the same access to Laurie, the midwife who has delivered all three of my kids.  Maybe it has something to do with all the new healthcare laws.  I am not inviting any sort of political debates with that statement.   I don't ultimately know why.  I will probably never know why.

With my first pregnancy I announced pretty early, and with each subsequence pregnancy, it has been later and later.  I didn't publicly announce this one until I had a due date, at which point, I was about 14 weeks.  I told the grandparents and sibling and said something on FB.  That is all I have done.  This is baby #4, there is no need for a lot of attention to me.  And frankly, where as most people have stuck with the normal "Congrats!", there have been a lot of other comments that I just do not want to hear.  I know in my heart that the people who say these rather hurtful things do not mean it to be taken that way, but really?  I don't need to hear about "Wow, they are going to really close, I don't know if I could do it." or another one?  I don't want to hear negative things about pregnancy, implied or otherwise.  I am the one who has to live with the consequences of my choices, good or bad.  This was and is a good choice.

A friend of mine didn't find out that I was pregnant until 2 weeks ago. She called me a brat for not telling her.  I honestly didn't realize she hadn't know.  We did talk about it a little as to why I had been so secretive about this pregnancy and we both came down to there is sooo much about motherhood that is badly judged.  How many kids you have, how much age difference there are between them, how you raise them, circumcision, vaccinations, public school/private/home schooling, etc.  I don't want to hear about I didn't do things the correct way, or how they wouldn't have done it that way.  I don't want to hear judgement about this.  This is a private thing between my husband and I, if I chose to share it with you, then I trust you, but WE, Ethan and I, get that choice.  I didn't decide to get pregnant with you (generalized audience), so unless it something nice to say, don't say it.  No pregnant woman wants to be told that they are huge, that are you sure your due date is right, that is a lot of kids, how can you afford them, you know how birth control works right?  That is rude, condescending and flat out mean. 

The worst thing about this is I am not surprised when a guy says something, most of the time, they genuinely do not know better, but when it is from another mother.  Do they honestly not remember how awkward it is to have a stranger fondle your stomach as if you aren't actually there? Or how close their own children were?  Hormones aside, we are already sensitive to the changes our bodies are going through, the sickness that afflict many, the supermom fa├žade that is the only thing that can be accepted when you walk out the door.  Yes, we love the weight gain, the swollen feet, the tenderness and freakly medical things that happen to us. 

I get gallstones while I am pregnant. This is not uncommon for pregnant women. It hit about 10% of pregnant women.  It has something to do with the estrogen levels messing with the bile producing and the bile is what breaks fat down.  If the bile isn't being produced, then fats aren't broken down and they can form gallstones.  Gallstones don't dissolve for the most part, there are some long term remedies for dissolving them but I mean like years long.  If they get too large, they can get stuck, similar to a kidney stone.

 They don't bother me when I am not pregnant, so I haven't gotten my gallbladder out.  I don't really want to get it out.  They started with Lyssa, even though I wasn't aware of what they were until half way through Ryan's.  All any doctor(6 to count at this point) will say is, well there is nothing we can do, so just get it removed after you aren't pregnant anymore.  If it turns out that it is infected or inflamed, then I will consent, but I would rather have it working at a lower percentage then not have it there at all, not being able to do even the low percentage.  I had 4 different attacks within the month of July, the last two of which I ended up in the ER for, one lasting 4 hrs and the other 6 hrs.  The second one would have been an er trip, but the pain stopped before Marme was able to get there to watch the kids, so we didn't go. To get an idea of the pain, it is an intense tightening feeling right below the rib cage, the whole way around.  It feels very hard to breath, even though you are capable of it.  I would compare it to late stage contractions with out the breaks in between.  They can be brought on from eating an fatty meal, carbonation, things of that nature, but also a baby's kicking can do it.  The relief from the pain usually happens the stone is dislodged and no longer blocking anything.  Not usually passing the stone.  So another words, it is still there to come back and haunt you.  They really don't like to do surgery on pregnant women, which I completely understand. Remember the story with the Duggar Family and their preemie child, Mom had emergency gallbladder surgery and it did affect the baby leading her to be premature.  With that said, they have given me different pain med to help "manage" the pain.  The one that was 6 hrs, I was on Vicodin and they still had to give me Demerol for it.

I have set up an appt. with an GI to talk to them about any other possible things that can be done, beside the watching of fatty foods and carbonation.  I have been watching what I eat and avoiding carbonation.  I can't do much about a baby kicking.  I refuse to believe there is nothing else they can do besides just wait until I am not pregnant anymore.  I am not the first person they have encountered that was unacceptable candidate for surgery, so I would like to hear what else is available from someone who specializes in these matters.  I felt bad, when I was making the appt. with the receptionist, she just kept going on and on how there really wasn't much they could do for me, until I finally yelled at her that, " Then you have 5 weeks until my appt. to find a possible fix/solution  to get me through, because I am not going to keep going to the ER 4 times a month for the next 5 months, scaring everyone in my family, as well as myself."  I know doctors hate Web M.D. and such as that, but if I can find different things, I don't know why none of them have been presented as options.  Almost all of what I have found say they are only temporary fixes, but that is all I really need, something to get me through the next couple of months.  I have also done a cleanse, and will be doing a repeat of it shortly, in hopes that this will help either pass the stones that are causing problem or help prevent new ones from forming. I have had a small attack since the cleanse, but it was far more manageable than the last three, so I have hope.